Sunday September 7th 2008

“Respect, Respond, Reconnect, Reconcile”

MESSAGE GIVEN BY THE REV. PAUL MULLEN

    I find it curiously satisfying that when they refer to the 10 commandments Paul, in our reading today, only gets three and Jesus, in the Parable of the Rich Young Man, only gets six. It makes me feel better about not being able to remember a lot of quotes from the Bible. It also reminds me that they are human and I appreciate that.

The apostle Paul tells us, in effect, that we don’t have to worry about keeping all ten of the commandments given to Moses. All we have to do is love our neighbour as we love ourselves. It’s all so simple, yet so difficult.

    St. Augustine (of whom I am not much of a fan) did say, “Love and do as you please.”

    I think it is important, given today’s situation – ecological crisis and a Canadian election – that we emphasize what Paul and Augustine assumed. That God must be included, as     must God’s creation be included. How can we love the creator if we don’t love the Creator’s creation and including God’s creatures?

    And once we radically embrace the unity of creation and creator then loving God includes loving others and loving your own self – as hard as that sometimes is.

    I attended a rally yesterday related to the Walk Against Violence. A local Muslim, Imam Syed Soharwardy, 52 years old, is walking across Canada to make a statement against violence and call people to end violence in their own lives including domestic violence and gang violence. He calls us all to renounce violence as a method for solving problems. Still has 1200 kms to go to reach Victoria.

    There were many speakers, from many religions and organizations, with basically one message – we are one, let’s love each other.

    It sounds so easy yet the results show just how difficult it is to put into practice. The central message does not take any great intellect to grasp, this is not rocket science or brain surgery, but frankly, in terms of doing and doing alone, building rockets and doing brain surgery are easier than loving our neighbours, let alone our enemies. Can you imagine the US in response to 9/11 offering forgiveness and a willingness to work out difficulties? It is so much easier to react and go to war and kill many times more people.

    But what if the process of building a solid relationship had started years earlier over much smaller issues?

    It all starts with respect, or as Aretha Franklin sings it “r-e-s-p-e-c-t.” Respect does not come easily, it needs to be learned and that involves some unlearning. Old attitudes and stereotypes must die and they die a hard death. But we cannot keep treating people as objects, or inferior, or labelling them crazy or enemy, and expect them to want to get along with us. We can see it in our own lives when we start sentences with phrases like, “you’re only . . .” or “you’re nothing but . . .”

    Once very useful to identify enemies and allies, stereotypes now tend to keep us from getting to know each other as fellow human beings, instead of caricatures, cartoon images of one another.

    Jesus says to go first to the one you are having difficulty with – preacher included – and tell them what your concern is. Have the respect to honour the reality that they might have a reality that is different than yours.

    Being responsible means having the ability to respond in respectful ways instead of reacting. Reacting has a defensiveness to it that brings on defensiveness in others. Likewise responding has an openness about it that invites openness in others. Often being responsive means we have to curb our reaction, our desire to fight or run and choosing a more appropriate response. It can mean facing our inner demons first. “We have seen the enemy and he is us.” (For those old enough to remember Pogo).

    Be prepared to be changed, especially in positive ways – at least initially. I say initially because all relationships have a honeymoon period. When we start to get to know someone as a human being it is generally a good experience. As our knowledge grows we find there are challenges to be faced.

    There is a book in our church library for dealing with other faith groups titled, “How to be a perfect stranger.” No one expects you to be perfect or to quit being yourself, just to be sensitive to the needs and expectations of others.

    Jesus says that, if we don’t get the response we seek, then engage an ally and try again with the two of you. If that doesn’t work, take it to the congregation. We haven’t done that in a while! Issues do come to the Church Board, however, that need to be talked out.   

    Jesus’ whole imperative is about right relations. As Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 5, “Therefore, if any one is in Christ, they are a new creation; the old has passed away, behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling with the world, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. So we are ambassadors for Christ, God appealing through us. We beseech you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake God made Jesus [a human being] so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” (Adapted for inclusion)

    “So that we might become the righteousness of God.” I am learning to not react to the word righteousness. For years I heard is as meaning self-righteousness, believing that you can do no wrong because of who you are or what you believe. I realize now that righteousness simply means seeking right relationships, healthy relationships, relationships that lead to wholeness. I hear this statement now as, “So that we might seek right relationships as God does.” I believe we are called to be in a right relationship with all aspects of life, or as First Nation people say, “right relationship in all my relations.”

    When we read in Matthew this process of resolving disputes it is about the desire to be in a right relation with someone who has wronged you. Jesus also spoke of when we know that we have wronged someone else. In the Sermon on the Mount he says, “So if you are offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Mat 5:23-24)

    Again the emphasis is on being reconciled, being in right relation. But there is no assumption that once a relationship is restored it will never be broken again. We are human and so is everyone else we intersect and interact with.

    I want to end with some short comments about the way this passage ends. 

    “and if the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” This is one of the reasons the Jesus Seminar believes that this passage did not come from Jesus, and they may well be right. It implies that if someone doesn’t reconcile after an intervention by the church community then they should be shunned – treated like a gentile or a tax collector. The passage lacks any reminder that Jesus invited us to love and reach out to gentiles and tax collectors. As a result it is important that we remember ourselves the attitude of Jesus. At the same time, some people are so abusive to us personally that a right relationship might well be one of considerable distance.

    In Fiddler on the Roof the Rabbi is asked if there is a blessing for the Czar. The Rabbi responds, “May the Lord bless and keep the Czar . . . far away from us!”

    Please don’t take anything that I say or that you find in the Bible as encouragement to stay in an abusive relationship. Sometimes distance is the only way abuse will stop, and even then there is no guarantee.

    Today’s reading (in verse 18) also has Jesus saying to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. Again, truly I tell you, if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven”

    The first of these two sentences contains the same words that are said to Peter when he confesses Jesus as the Messiah. We need to move beyond thinking of Heaven as a place we go to after death, if you haven’t already. Heaven is where God is and there is nowhere God is not. Here I believe the statement means that the way we treat people profoundly affects our relationship with God. Put another way, how we treat each other, especially those who mistreat us, has cosmic implications. It also means that when we mutually agree before God that our relationship needs healing, God will help.

    For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them." (Matthew 18:20)